Tuesday, September 24, 2013

What's your theme


Apocalypse Theme
Put your media player of choice on Shuffle and this will be the music to your movie


First Song is the overall theme for the Apocalypse – Final Countdown – Europe
Second Song is the one that plays during your first zombie kill – The Sinner is You – Volbeat
Third Song plays while you are getting chased by a Horde – Walkin on Sunshine – Katrina and the Waves
Fourth Song plays while you are being forced to kill your loved one – Party Doll – Buddy Knox
Fifth Song plays when you find your new love – Rio – Duran Duran
Sixth Song plays when you make your final stand – We are Young – Fun
Seventh Song  plays when you (think you) make it through it all – Venus – Bananarama
Eighth Song plays when you discover a bite mark on you – The Mighty Fall – Fallout Boy

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Back to the old drawing board?


I had a dream about a week ago that Craig and I had split up.  So the following morning did my usual of sending him a Have a great day Love you and told him about my dream and asked if we were okay.  He said he needed some space.  I was a little set back by that as we only see each other once a week due his crazy work schedule and talk for only 15-20 minutes at night.  But he wants his space, I will give him space.  Now the callous side of me is saying “whatever.”  The other side of me is saying “he’s really stressed at work, this will pass just hang in there.”

So I figure while he’s doing whatever it is he needs to do, I will get back to basics and get my ass back to the gym, delve back into my music hobby, devote more time to my blog, get going on my house projects that have been put on the back burner and spend much needed time with friends and family.  I don’t know how long he is going to need and I can’t guarantee I will be around when he does figure out whatever it is that he needs to.  That’s the part that breaks my heart.  We’ve been together for a little over a year and I don’t want to give up on him.  At the same time I’m hoping he doesn’t give up on me, on us.  I’ve waited for our relationship, been through a lot of assholes and dating horror stories (although they are funny now).  I don’t want to just walk away.  Now I know what some people are thinking “I would just leave blah blah blah”.  But those are also the same people that would be quick to divorce as soon as something goes wrong and that’s just not my style.  Not every relationship is perfect everybody has their ups and downs.  This just happens to be our down.  So I will just kick back and relax as best as I can until whatever is meant to happen happens.

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Too much for one weekend


Last week was quite the week.  I started it off with a bang and ended with one (and not in a good way).  Work was interesting, busy and a tad bit on the stressful side.  I tried hard to hide the grumpy, but don’t think it worked out quite so well.  The two things I was excited about last week was spending time with my sister on Wednesday night and then talking to Craig after work.  He always makes things better…well not last week.  Friday was a good day, finally had a little time to breathe while at work.  5pm rolls around and it’s WOO HOO WE ARE FREE!!!  3 day weekend, this is going to be great.  I had plans to go grocery shopping and Saturday I was going to go down to Craig’s early and surprise him by having dinner in the oven when he got home from work.  Then the plan was derailed. 

I was coming up to the stop light and noticed 2 cars on the light rail tracks and one car sitting at the crosswalk.  I thought to myself “look at the dumbass sitting on the tracks, don’t they know better?”  so I stopped what I thought was far enough back just in case the crossing arms decided to come down it would give them enough room to back up.  Well sure enough the lights started blinking and the crossing arms started coming down.  Before I knew it was looking at the backend of a Toyota 4 Runner as she backed right into me.  I could not believe what just happened.  I had a bad week and then this.  She felt bad for what happened and I was going into hysterical mode and couldn’t even remember how to use my phone to call my sister.  Since she wasn’t answering her phone, I called my brother in law.  Thankfully he answered and I spoke to him.  We moved our mess to the parking lot across the street and exchanged information.  She offered to wait while my family was on the way, but I told her it wasn’t necessary that I would be okay. 

She asked that I call her once they arrived so she knew I was okay.  Once Mike got there, I broke down again.  But did call her to let her know that they had arrived and I was okay.  I also let Craig know that I wouldn’t be down as I didn’t want to go anywhere just wanted to go home.  All in all it could have been worse.  The airbag didn’t go off, we both walked away with no injuries and as I told her, I would much have her hit me than get creamed by a train.  She did send me a text on Saturday asking how I was doing. If I had felt like I had been hit by a train (bad joke).  But we were both just a little stiff and sore. Claim has been filed with the insurance. Ironically we both have the same insurance company.  So it’s up to them to duke it out now.  Car is over at the body shop for repairs and I have a pretty Blue Volkswagon Jetta for a bit.

Saturday morning Bluka had a vet appointment as she was wheezing and coughing, so to be safe I took her in for a checkup.  Well, a few chest x-rays and a bottle of antibiotics later she has Bronchitis.  So she gets medicine once a day for 4 days, then twice a week with a follow up appointment.  I’m thinking I got her taken care of then Fabio starts throwing up. Which with him, I’m thinking it’s something he ate because there was chunks of what I think were other animal in it.  Who knows.  All I know if that I almost threw up cleaning it.  So I was at home this weekend with two sick kitties,  a sore/stiff neck and upper back.  ONLY to throw in there no phone call, text NOTHING from Craig on Sunday or yesterday until I reached out to him.  I’m getting to that part

I spoke to Craig on Saturday after he got home and the phone call ended with “I will talk to you tomorrow”.  Okay fine, I had a headache and just wanted to go lay down anyways.  But ended up crying myself to sleep Saturday night.  Sunday morning I looked like hell, but  I spent the morning cleaning the house and making my guest room as cozy as I could, but not too cozy.  I was hoping that Craig would come up after the week I had I just wanted to spend some time with him and just be.  But I got nothing.  No phone call, no text.  A big fat zero zilch nada NOTHING.  I looked at it as a reminder as to why I am the strong independent woman that I am and why I was single for so long.  Sometimes I just feel better off that way and this was one of those times.  Sunday night came with still no word from him, so again I went to sleep feeling alone.  But I knew I wasn’t, as I have the love and support from my family.  Roxane came up and we took the nieces to Apple Hill for a few hours, then Roxane and I went to lunch.  I always feel better when I’m with my sisters. 

Not being able take it anymore and I told him that I needed to know he would be there for me no matter what.  Meaning, I really needed him this weekend and he was being one with the couch.  He translated my “I don’t want to play anymore” comment into I wanted to be alone so that’s what he did.  We did talk and he apologized, but it still doesn’t make it any better.  It’s been a weekend of ups and downs, one that I really don’t want to ride anymore.  But it can only get better from here and I’m strong enough to wade my way through the muck and persevere.    My bank account though, is a completely different story.